Amazing! Human Piss Added to Water Park Well Before People Actually Get There

CALIFORNIA — A recent study out of the University of San Diego reveals that human piss is added to the water before anyone actually gets there. “If it was only chlorine, guests would be suspicious,” says UCSD microbiologist Dr. Karina Miller. “They’d be swimming around and wondering why the waters didn’t have that familiar taste of pee.” Which is why before the park opens, faculty dump anywhere between 50-100 gallons of piss, sometimes pissing into the water themselves for good measure. “We always like to leave just enough for guests to freely piss themselves,” says general manager of Raging Waters, Raul Santos. At the time of publication scientists believe they’re close to solving guests' inability to defecate themselves freely without draining the entire park.